Monday, July 20, 2009


Is love a one-time-lump-sum investment that you make to go on enjoying its returns unlimited?

Or is it a daily wage earning that you must work for each day?

Why is it so hard to reach out to the one you love? Is it ego? Is it confusion? Is it a lack of understanding of the situation? At that moment, does love take a back seat? Mundane existence then, is a mere reciprocal? I reach out to you, you are condescending; you reach out to me, you are patronizing.

Should I, then, wait till you reach out to me? Will it not be too late by then?

What do I do with the days thus spent waiting? Shall I subtract them from my life or shall I count them in? If I count them in, would they not be too painful to retain?

If I subtract them, will not my life become too short?


hitch writer said...

Love must be expressed... feelings must be conveyed...

there is no limit to loving and it need not be reciprocal...

thats what we must keep reminding ourselves...

We tend to fight the most with the people with whom we are closest...

thats life my friend...

Monika said...

such lovely words...

dont wait reach out before time runs out is what i believe in

D said...

Don't work, where they don't know the value of your work and don't invest where they are no returns on your investment. Not unless you can love unconditionally.

How Do said...

Kab se hoon kya bataoon jahan-e-kharaab mein,
Shab aur hijr ko bhi rakhoon gar hisaab mein..

To answer ur riddle( just my opinion, of course):
Love is like gardening - you have to get up every morning and start over again.

Why do we not reach out? Because we are stupid. Thats why. We dont realise that in the process of trying to make the other person miserable, we are also successfully doing the same thing to ourselves also.

There is a practical flip side to it - if you reach out every time, you start getting taken for granted. hmm... life is difficult.. and they should stop teaching kids abt black and white shades.. there are no blacks and whites in the world.

i am what i am said...

never hesitate to reach out to one whom you is too short to hold grudges against your loved ones

Pradip Biswas said...

If you may find out the reason for love then that is yet to mature. I believe love is without any reason, reciprocation, condition etc. it is spontaneous,the one you can not supress and continue to love whether rejected or not, whether the other reciprocates or not.

Balvinder Singh said...

Love is like a child. One conceives it, carries it and bears the pain to deliver it. One is lucky enough if it is not a still born (one sided).

Love comes with all the oddities that a child has. It is demanding, it is possessive, it is jealous and it is hurting without actually meaning to be. It laughs and it cries as per its own whims and fancies. It comes with possessiveness and detachment at the same time.

When it is in company, it is not only carefree but gets careless but when left alone, it pines for attention. The moment it likes something, it grabs it but next moment throws it away and then cries when finds the same broken.

Like a child love has to be cleansed every day of all those oddities and has to be nurtured to be kept healthy and growing.

Happy loving.

Gurinderjit Singh ( said...

Wow.. ...

Your questions are between 2 "bodies"... these 2 bodies have to go to a level where each doesn't need to ask any question, wait for response...just the way Gurbani describes.. how to achieve HIM...

Kiran said...

wow...exactly the same questions that arise in my mind at times...
life is too short..make the most of it and spend it with the ones you love!

Mampi said...

Hitchwriter, Howdy,PradipDa, Balvinder, Guri-You almost wrote poems in response to these words. I wouldn't counter comment. Thanks.

Monika, Kiran, I am - you are right, but they say, Ghulam Farida, dil othey dayiye jithey agla kadar pachaaney,,,

D-Despite what I wrote just above, I cannot help it, can you? can any of us?

The Rat... said...

i heard someone saying "How far u wud go to get back ur loved one" so i reached high and low to get back my love....

but again, when do i stop.. when shud i realise that enuf is enuf??

Love is complicated... it gets back to u when u stop reaching out to it :-) sighs

Philip said...

love is surely not daily wage earning nor lumpsum. its somewhere in between IMHO.

Balvinder Singh said...

Mampi, you asked for it. Thanks for calling it a poem, in that case i will put it on my blog to share with others too.

Cynic in Wonderland said...

it's a systematic investment plan, you put in a little everyday but it gets compounded over a period of time.

Anonymous said...

nice and thought provoking:)

Anonymous said...

That was profound.

What do I say... except, love is all these things, all these experiences, the waiting, the wanting, the pain and the happiness. Why do we need to reason out everything? Wouldn't that take the beauty and magic of love away? :)

maheshinder_singh said...

I wish I could comment

Quirky Indian said...

Wow. Profound. Very nice.

And why does Mahesh say he wishes he could comment? :-)

Quirky Indian

Mampi said...

The Rat-Exactly my dear, But my question is - exactly when do you stop reaching out to it?

Philip- Perhaps.

Balvinder-Your comment is a beautiful post in itself. Please go ahead to post it as an independent one.

Cyn-Well said.

Mithe-Thanks my dear.

SoulSafar-Reason cannot be wished away, that is the bane of love. Hence the questions.

Mahesh-So do I.

QI-Only he can tell why he cannot.

The Rat... said...

i seriously need an answer for that myself... :( i am in a soup myself reaching out for someone particular for past 6 years :(

Roop Rai said...


nothing more. :p

cuz i have nothing valuable to offer.

very well expressed though as always. :)

Anonymous said...

i think love is a daily wage earning.. u have to work hard at it every day..dnt think u can attain it in a day. why dont ppl reach out? im guessing the two biggest reasons are a big,fat ego and a lack of understanding of the situations and sometimes the person as well.. i wud like to believe its a good idea to swallow ur own ego and reach out to the person. why waste precious days?

btw, i like the line of thot of this post..a well written post, mampi

Anonymous said...

What is Love..This is the most difficult question to be answered for the means diffrent for diffrent individuals..

For has to be give and take..but i feel it could be giving only and need not to be reciprocal..

Once we stop expecting the same from other person..we don't have to worry about these additions and subtractions of days in makes life lot easier..You just have to focus on the goodness of the other person..if it can be done can also love easily..

Love is not just a feeling or is intimacy, passion and commitment..and always remember nobody is perfect..

C'est La Vie, My dear friend..


Sucharita Sarkar said...

At 18, it seemed that love was a lumpsum invested for a lifetime, that one passionate declaration from my side would be repaid by a lifetime of devotion from the other side. But another 18 years of experience have taught me that love is like a recurring deposit where I have to put in my bit of effort (a listening ear, a tight hug, a family job done, a special dish cooked, a whispered endearment, a clasp of the hand...) every day to keep getting returns on my initial investment.

Veena said...

Beautiful Mampi.. Loved these lines - What do I do with the days thus spent waiting? Shall I subtract them from my life or shall I count them in? If I count them in, would they not be too painful to retain?

If I subtract them, will not my life become too short?

Lady, do seriously think about becoming a writer

Phoenixritu said...

You got to work at love ... and its a life time worth of a job. You got to work at love even if you are feeling like killing the much loved person! That is my opinion .....

Jasdeep said...

How About :

har haqeeqat majaaz ho jaaye
kaafiron ki namaaz ho jayee

Ishq dil mein rahe to ruswa ho
lab pe aaye to raaz ho jaaye

umr besuud kat rahee hai 'Faiz'
kaash afshaa-e-raaz ho jaaye

Jasdeep said...

Beautiful words by the way..
you should try your hand at verse :)

Nishtha Saxena said...

love--- i'm just expressionless when i hear this word..
i feel that it is all fate, destiny which determines who comes into our lives...
but i don't even understand-- should we just wait or look out ourselves...?!
quite confusing!

sukumbho said...

Wow, intense thoughts at the time of worldwide recession. Lovely expression, must say. Buy urself a time machine and go back in time. Do some simple maths the other way:

What did you do with the days spent together? Wont you add them to your life? If u count them in, would they not be joyful to retain forever?

If u add them up, will not ur life become an endless fountain of bliss?

(What Guru-gyan! Just cut/paste ur sentences).

Lazyani said...


Love is something which should be unconditional and without expectation of a reciprocation. I know that it's easier said than done but-----

Great write-up and the music on your blog site pulls me back repeatedly.

Gazal said...

intrigued by your riddle and got caught up reading all the comments.

It's amazing that the same feeling evokes so many varied responses in people.We all have had our moments of love and hate with LOVE.
inspite of all the pain it may sometimes bring,its still worth being in LOVE.

Sujata said... always. Love must be conveyed, no matter what. Life is too short.

But on flip side, I also agree with one another comment- you also risk taken for granted.

Oreen said...

well, the answer is in loving multiple people... one gone, two more to fill the gap...

you just gotta carefully manage them like coins...

Oreen said...

okay, that was my world view, which obviously makes life easy... but is very difficult to follow in real life.

in fact, i don't subscribe to it either. i sincerely hope this is a fictional piece and not reflections of your own mind...

Mama - Mia said...

my state of mind as of now is all i can say...

lovely lovely post!


Imp's Mom said...

my comment is missing, but I'm subscribed to the comments :-((((

Manish Raj said...

Dear Mampi

Love is like a star
that stays in the sky
whether it’s day,
or night;

Basking in sunlight,
Or clouded by ego
We’ve tend to miss them
for a while ;

But if you have ever loved someone,
You have risen to that sky.
And you have made
a star your own.

When dark will surround you
And you’ll confuse with directions
Your star will shine
and will show you the way.

Don’t mistrust yourself
and make up every time it breaks.
Indeed life is too short,
live it, love it, before it melts

Best Wishes

dipali said...

Although we know that it's there, it's nice to have appreciation expressed on a regular basis, an affirmation of the self is always welcome, particularly by the most important person in one's life.

AnjuGandhi said...

i m hooked to your blog
this particular one is so philosphical. very intersting

Manasa said...

Care for the ones who care and love you :) No use thinking of those who never think of you. The more you think of them, the more you hurt yourself!

Sidhusaaheb said...

Meinu ki pataa ji...MeiN taaN chhaRaa bandaaN! :D

Sidhusaaheb said...

On second thoughts, however, I think that the answers to all your questions are to be found at:


Mampi said...

Rat-Hope you find the answer soon.


Mandy-Yeah, perhaps you ar right. Glad you liked it.

Geena-I know how much you have 'given' in your relationship. But tell me, how do you not expect??

Sucharita-Yes that is YOUR investment. What about his share?

Veena-My dear, it is just a thought written down. Writer, ah. It takes a lot to be one.

Ritu-You are right. it is consistent effort that pays.

Jasdeep-Well quoted. Well, that punjabi blog is supposed to be verse.

Nishtha-Yeah, that confusion is what I was trying to solve through this post.

Sumanto-Cut paste or whatever, but thanks for helping me count my blessings. Buddy, what would I do without you?

LazyAni-Yes, easier said than done. Someone tell me how 'not to expect'?

Gazal-Yeah, all these brilliant people, writing beautiful little comments have set me thinking too.
Yes, it IS worth being in love.

Sujata-So what IS your take?

Oreen-People like me who are unable to manage one relationship cannot manage multiple relationships. We are hopeless-type people. But thanks for your suggestion.

Abha-thank you my dear. Hope you are better now.

Jyo-Thanks but I didnt get your comment.

Manish-Cannot thank you enough for these words. Thank you my dear.

Dipali-You got me right.

Anju-thanks for your encouragement. Keep visiting my dear.

Manasa-Yes they hurt. If, however, life were so predictable, there would be no riddles.

SS-You will understand it when you fall in love.

UL said...

why should love be all about questions? it should really be an answer to everything - if not, it aint love, me thinks :) loved this post...