Wednesday, April 12, 2006


I didn’t know Joti, I hadn’t talked to her ever. I don’t even remember her face anymore after I saw her four days back lying on the bed with those pipes and tubes protruding out of her body. Her dead twins were inside her womb. And she had no idea where she was. Lying on that hospital bed, she was so vulnerable, so expectedly swollen. Only she had no will, no power, and no inspiration to push those bodies out of herself. The undue delay in operating her to flush them out finally took her life.

Only of 27 years, she left behind a five and a half year old daughter, almost like my own Rasan. The child would never know what all happened. Her life would be one great tragedy till most likely Gagan, her dear dear Mamu, rescues her out of it. I wish Gagan takes her with him. The kid is an orphan as of today. Her dad will remarry, I m sure-I saw it in his eyes. God knows what fate will bring in for her of whom I know nothing but who comes to my mind as a little Rasanmeet. What if something should happen to me! No, Mahesh would never behave in such an apathetic way – the way that man was behaving in those circumstances.

Kuldip Manak sings at the back of my mind –

maa hundi aye maa o duniya waaleyo,

rabba dev karey arjoyee,
bacheyan di maa marey na koi

I wish Joti had been spared-if only another 20 odd years, sans her twins-one of whom was a boy. Perhaps it was for the sake of a male child that she had to sacrifice her dear life and that of her dear alive daughter. Who knows? Who will ever know??


Anonymous said...

will your underlined messege touch the conscious of few hearts or even single mind ? and if this happens,it will be worth a million or worth a life. what you expect more?
goodluck. m.i.s.sahota

Grewal, Taran said...

your story is very touching and its painful, but this is life... expect the unexpected or expect nothing from it till you die. We can only pray for the departed soul to rest in peace.

Anonymous said...

It is so unfortunate that right from the childhood women in our country are taught to bear sufferings and suffer at every stage of life-i think this is the only reason why such happenings are increasing everyday.But the kind of effort put in by you through this blog would make people think atleast once about such issues...keep it up..such small efforts are definitely going to make big diffrence! Gdogra.

Sukhjit said...

Dear Manpreet didi ji,

You were right. Re-living the events of that day would be hard for Gagan. I could see his expression as he read each line. I was not there, but to this day I am shocked and speechless. Being a woman, it is okay to publicly display my emotions, but Gagan always has to think before freely expressing his emotions and thoughts.

Many times I wish I could know what was going on in Gagan's mind, but that is not possible. This loss has left Gagan changed forever. I still remember Gurpreet's death [Gagan's brother]. His death didn't touch me the same way Jyoti's did. I only knew Gurpreet [or Kala] as a voice on the other end of the phone.

I think that me and him had a lot in common, and I was anxiously awaiting the day I would get to meet him. His death brought me to India. I had wanted to visit India ever since I was a little girl. During my visit, everyone felt that I shouldn't have come, but now I have realized why I came. That was my only chance to meet Jyoti.

There is one thing that always comes to my mind when I think of Jyoti didi. She had for the longest time been saying, "Take Jasleen, I won't be able to take care of her with the kids on the way." I always used to re-assure her that things would be just fine. I think that Jyoti didi's soul will rest in peace after I take Jasleen and raise her as my own. She will not be my niece, but my daughter.

There is no one who can replace anyone's biological mother. However, we should try to make the best out of every situation.

P.S. I wanted to thank you for starting this blog. You have inspired me to keep my own blog. Sometimes it is just a thought that blossoms into a vision and becomes a goal.

Keep up the good work... God blesses those that bless others:)

Sukhjit K Bajwa

Roop Rai said...

:( barha dukh laggiya. the pain comes across. gosh, i feel horrible. why did they wait for so long?