Tuesday, October 14, 2008

English Comes to Me Also

I just finished marking exam-papers from different courses and I found some gems in the grammar section of a few brilliant answer books. How could I return them without sharing with you? After you finish reading them, I am sure you would, like me, be convinced that English and its grammar would have to change its paradigms in order to accomodate everybody who can write an ABC.

First, the translation question and its diverse answers:

Dharti sooraj duawaley ghummdi hai/Dharti Soorya ke ird-gird ghoomti hai.
1. THE EARTH AROUND THE SUN.
2. THE EARTH IS ROUNDING THE SUN.
3. THE ARTH SUN OF THE SON.

Main kaee saalan toh videsh jaan barey soch reha haan/
Main kaee varsho’n se videsh jaane ke barey mein soch raha hoon.
I HAVE BEEN/AM THOUGHTING TO GO TO ABROAD FOR MANY YEARS.

Simla wich barish ho rahi howegi/Simla me baarish ho rahi hogi.
1. THE RAIN WILL BE RUNNING IN SHIMLA.
2. SHIMLA SHALL BE RAINING.

Tussi os da mazak uraa rahey ho/Aap uska mazaak uraa rahey hain.
YOU ARE FLYING FUN OF HIM.

Shatabdi express samey de mutabak chall rahi si/Shatabdi express samay ke anusaar chal rahi thi.
SHTABADI EXPRESS IS WALKING AT THE TIME.

Manukh galti da putla hai/Manushya galtiyon ka putla hai.
HUMAN IS STATUE OF MISTAKES.
HUMAN BEING IS THE EFFIGY OF MISTAKES. (use of the word ‘ effigy’ was highly impressive)

Then there was the baap of all grammar problems:
The students were supposed to fill up, MAKE HAY ­__________

And apart from other fill ups, what had me laughing like crazy was:

Make hay EXTRACT HONEY.

Now go extract it if you can, out of the hay, I mean.

After all,
Mujhey bhi English aati hai,
English comes to me also.

27 comments:

Jasdeep said...

This is awesome :) ROFL

churningthewordmill.wordpress.com said...

lmao!
there are FABULOUS!!! u cud sell this in the newspaper and make money!!(it would b kinda mean to the kids..but u wud b rich! ;) )
mandira

Manasa said...

hahahah... ROFL.. can't imagine rain running ;)

During my school n college days, teachers used to read out such answers written by students in the entire class :D and all of us used to giggle..

Sidhusaaheb said...

MeiN car tey aa rahi si.

I WAS COMING ON THE CAR.

Source: http://manmahesh.blogspot.com/2008/07/child-on-road.html

Apologies in advance!

:D

tulips said...

hilarious!

Indian Home Maker said...

Good Morning...this is so delightfully funny, and looks like the kids have been watching the news lately, hence the use of the word 'effigy' :)))
rotfl

Ashwani Saini said...

thanks mampi for writing to me. I've been successful in adding music to my blog, just check it out.

Pinku said...

hey!!!

it was hilarious...

cant stop grinning.

But I hope your students dont see this blog...

RiverSoul said...

Hilarious, mampiji
:)
I've nearly split my sides laughing
:)
Those are some gems you've uncovered.
:)
Ps
Blog updated
:)

Monika said...

lol!!!! u know this brought back the memory of the days when we used to sit with my mom and help her check english papers of her class 6-7 students....

:)

Salil said...

Did you by any chance get my old answer papers, ahem?
By the way,
'Shatabdi express samay ke anusaar chal rahi thi' - SHTABADI EXPRESS IS WALKING AT THE TIME is definitely wrong. Since it is past tense, as 'thi' is used, it should be SHTABADI EXPRESS WAS WALKING AT THE TIME!
ROFL stuff!
Cheers,

Imp's Mom said...

this is too good :) ROTFL

Mampi said...

Jasdeep- :)

Mandy-Yeah, thanks for the get-rich-quick idea. ;)

Manasa-Rain bhi run karti hai ji, hamarey idhar.

SS-Hota hai hota hai, after all HUMAN IS THE EFFIGY OF MISTAKES.

Tulips-Thank you.

IHM-Yea, perhaps.

Ashwani-You are welcome. I will surely check out.

Pinku-Nah, they know nothing of it.

RiverSoul-I love them for these gems.

Monika-My daughter enjoys these parts too.

Salil-Maybe, but then the papers didnt come from the store. They were from fresh exam papers. Yes, The shatabdi mistake should have been committed carefully.

Imp's Mom-I knew you would enjoy these.

Mama - Mia said...

this is brilliant!! :D

we love teachers sharing such gems!!

cheers!

abha

Majaz said...

LOL

phoenixritu said...

How about

Stop your ghittar pittar, the Principal is rotating in the corridor

Lovely list, simply awesome. Can I please copy+paste and send it to people who will enjoy it?

DeeplyDip said...

lol!! I am also "thoughting" this is a funny post ;)

Mampi said...

Abha-Thankyou. I am sure I can come up with more such posts in December, when they again sit for the tests. LOL.

Majaz-Eik teacher hi mera dard samjh kar LOL kar sakta tha.

Ritu-Sure you can use it for your email forwards. And your contribution was great.

DeeplyDip-Glad you are thoughting, warna ppl hardly baather yaar.

phatichar said...

"hanste hanste pet mein bal par gaye"

laughing laughing in my stomach is scarring/marking

Anonymous said...

English comes to me

is an interesting posting.

Stundents are not at fault, if they don't know about
GRAMMER-BIBI JI.
Fault lies some where in Primary and Secondary teachers who build them up with such BEAUTIFUL English and fault lies in those parents too who brought them up without giving proper attention to their wards.

Most of the parents have no time to attend their wards's home work even.

This posting is an alarming sign for those who are at fault.

You did a wonderful job, by posting some of the facts.

Keeep it up!

Dhindsa

PARRY said...

Now it is proved that English is a very funny language. :)

Gazal said...

how did i miss this one...

and imagine we are still sane after checking this insanity

kiran said...

Original Laughter Maa'am. Send it to reader's digest.Guaranteed prize 4 U!

How do we know said...

haanji, English comes to u also.. :-) ROTFL and half my office too!! Too Cool!!

Monika,Ansh said...

Oh, this had me in splits. Lovely!! :)

Mampi said...

Phatichar-Wrong English. peit mein bal are folds in the stomach. Now iron them out, hehe.

Mama-The kids are so handicapped that they know neither Punjabi, nor Hindi and English ta samney ee ae.

Parry-yes, English has to be taalked and waalked.

Gazal-Yehi hai zindagi, Kaa karenge.

Kiran-All these readers, friends who come to my blog are such fun to be with-thats as good as RD, aint it?

HDWK-Hanji English come to me also, slowly slowly.

Monika,Ansh-Glad you enjoyed it. Welcome to my blog.

@lankr1ta said...

I like the extract honey bit...